Genesis 38:24 And it came to pass about three months after, that it was told Judah, saying, Tamar thy daughter in law hath played the harlot; and also, behold, she is with child by whoredom. And Judah said, Bring her forth, and let her be burnt.

Judah is quick to judge his daughter-in-law Tamar. Judah had seen God take the lives of two of his sons after they were married to Tamar. Judah refused to allow his youngest son to marry Tamar for fear that his youngest son would also be killed. Judah was blaming Tamar for the deaths of his sons.

Judah probably felt a little guilty in deceiving Tamar and not giving his third son to her. Now he had an excuse to absolve his guilt. By allowing Tamar to be burnt because she played the harlot, he no longer would have to feel guilty about his youngest son marrying Tamar.

Judah was quick to judge and slow to think. Judah did not demonstrate any love for his daughter-in-law Tamar and did not make any inquiries into who the possible man who had slept with Tamar was. Judah just wanted the problem out of his life.

When things go wrong in our lives, we often act hastily just like Judah. We are quick to judge others without taking any thought for how we have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. Christ commanded us that we are not to try to pull out the mote out of someone else’s eye until we have first taken care of the beam in our own eyes.

It is a natural thing to judge another person. If you find fault in another, it helps make you look better in your own eyes. By finding how others have failed and fallen short of the glory of God, you no longer feel guilty for your own sins.

God does not want you to be judging yourself by the standards of others. Instead, you need to focus your attention upon the perfect standard of God. When it comes to others, you ought to be looking for ways that you can love your neighbor as yourself and looking for ways that you can forgive those who have sinned against you.

Satan wants to get your attention off of yourself and how you have fallen short of the glory of God. By adding temperance to your life, you have the strength to resist the temptation to judge others and instead to find ways to love those who you wish to judge. By allowing God to change your focus, you will be free to learn to love your neighbor as yourself.

The guilt of Judah drove him to condemn Tamar for something that he was guilty of. Guilt will cause you to do terrible things to those who are around you. Rather than continue to allow guilt to consume your life, stop the destructive process and open your eyes to a new relationship with God. Start taking responsibility for your actions.

The ways of the world are a strong influence. However, you must be quick to exercise self-control so that you do not continue to do that which is right in your own eyes. God has a higher standard for your life.

Judah was willing to kill his own daughter-in-law without hearing any of the facts. While you may not be so quick to kill someone without a trial, how many times have you allowed yourself to be angry at a relative without taking the time to hear both sides of the story?

Genesis 38:16 And he turned unto her by the way, and said, Go to, I pray thee, let me come in unto thee; (for he knew not that she was his daughter in law.) And she said, What wilt thou give me, that thou mayest come in unto me?

A tragic event occurred in the life of Judah – his wife had died. Judah needed comfort and he sought it from all the wrong places. Judah never would have sinned and had a relationship with his daughter-in-law if he had been able to control his sexual desires and not pursue a harlot for a few minutes of pleasure.

Because of the death of his wife, Judah was at a particularly weak time in his life. Judah was susceptible to temptation because he was focused upon those things that he no longer was able to enjoy as a result of the death of his wife. Judah permitted his mind to long for that which was not proper for him to have until he found an opportunity to partake of that which he had lost.

Tamar had been around Judah enough to know that if faced with a harlot, he would desire to come into her. Tamar knew the weakness of Judah and she was able to play to that weakness during a time when he was lonely.

While you may not have a history of sexual perversion like Judah, it does not mean that you do not have a weakness that Satan would love to exploit. Satan knows those areas where you are more likely to yield to temptation. Satan knows that if he can discourage you enough, you will walk right into his trap where you will sin and fall short of the glory of God.

Judah sleeping with his daughter-in-law was not his proudest moment in his life. Judah was faced with a temptation and rather than exercise some temperance in his life, Judah willingly yielded to the temptation and made his life an example to us of the consequences of failing to restrain our sin nature.

It does not matter what the temptation is, greater is HE that is in us then he that is of this world. God does not allow you to face a temptation that you are not able to overcome. This means the next time you are tempted to sin and fall short of the glory of God, you must cry out to HIM for help and allow HIM to give you the strength to exercise self-control so that HE might be glorified through your life.

Judah had a double standard. While it was not permissible for Tamar to sleep with other men, it was permissible for him to sleep with other women. Because of Judah’s lack of self-control, he imposed a different standard on others than he required himself to live. Judah lacked temperance and it resulted in him doing something that he never would have done if he had full knowledge.

Sin will always cost you more than you expect. Playing with sin is like a mouse playing with the cheese in a mouse trap. The mouse might get lucky and get the cheese a couple of times, however, if it continues its dangerous practice, eventually the trap will spring and the mouse will be trapped.

It does not matter if your pet sin is lust, greed, or pride, if you allow it to get a hold of your life, it will destroy you eventually. You must learn to say no to the temptations that beset you. As you allow self-control to reign supreme in your life, you will learn the true meaning of living free from the bondage of sin.

Genesis 38:11 Then said Judah to Tamar his daughter in law, Remain a widow at thy father’s house, till Shelah my son be grown: for he said, Lest peradventure he die also, as his brethren did. And Tamar went and dwelt in her father’s house.

It is never your fault. Judah had just lost two sons. Both Er and Onan were killed by the Lord. Judah determined that it must be Tamar’s fault and as such, he felt justified in deceiving Tamar so as to save his son Shelah from the destructive influences of Tamar. Judah did not stop and look at his own life to see if maybe he was the problem. Judah did not stop and take the time to work with his son Shelah to make sure that there was nothing wrong in his life that would cause God to kill him. Instead, Judah determined the only way to solve the problem was to get Tamar as far away as possible.

Judah had no intentions of allowing Shelah and Tamar to marry. Judah had already lost two sons and he was not going to lose another. Rather than examine his own life and those who God had given him charge over, it was much easier in Judah’s mind to rid himself of the one who in his mind was the problem.

It was Judah who had initially married a Canaanite woman. It was Judah who obtained a Canaanite woman as a wife for his son Er. It was Judah who had not taken the time to train up his sons in the ways of God so that they would not act in a way that displeased God.

In the same way that Judah refused to take responsibility for his situation, so also do we attempt to shift blame for our own actions. Ever since the first sin with Adam and Eve, it has been the sin nature of man to deny responsibility and attempt to focus the attention upon someone else. Adam immediately blamed God and Eve for his partaking of the forbidden fruit. Eve immediately blamed the serpent for her sin.

Just because you find someone else to blame for your sinful behavior, it does not mean that you will escape liability. It may cause you some momentary relief to justify in your head how someone else is at fault. Nonetheless, just because you find someone else to blame, it does not mean that you will not suffer the consequences of your actions. God knows the truth and the wages of sin is death. Both Adam and Eve had to suffer the consequences for their actions.

The next time things start to get rough in your own life, instead of looking for a way to escape liability, stop and seek the truth. Take responsibility for your actions. Instead of looking for others to blame, examine your own life to see if there is some hidden sin that God desires you to confess. God may be allowing you to face this trial so as to bring you to the place of repentance.

It always seems easier to play the blame game for your problems. However, one who has diligently added temperance to their life understands the importance of taking responsibility for those areas where they have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.

Judah refused to examine his own life to see if there were areas that he needed to import. Judah was willing to continue to live his life by his own standards. Rather than take responsibility, Judah continued to duck his responsibility. Judah did that which is right in his own eyes. Judah chose to deceive Tamar and put her in a compromising situation. Judah was not concerned about anyone other than himself. Judah needed to exercise a little self-control over his life and stop thinking only about himself and start considering the needs of others.

Genesis 38:9 And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother’s wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother.

Er had committed a great wickedness against God and God took his life. Judah turned to his second born son Onan and instructed him to go into his brother’s wife and raise up a seed for his brother. Onan was willing to sleep with Tamar but rather than allow Tamar to become pregnant, Onan was selfish and he withdrew.

Onan was willing to enjoy the matrimonial privileges with Tamar but he was not willing to accept the responsibility that came with taking Tamar as his wife. Onan was not thinking about anyone other than himself and his own selfish desires. Onan chose not to think about his father, Tamar, or his brother Er.

You are not the only person living in this world. The world does not resolve around you and your selfish desires. The world does not owe you great wealth and happiness. God has commanded us to love our neighbor as ourselves. When Onan spilled his seed upon the ground, he was not demonstrating love to anyone else involved in the situation. Furthermore, Onan’s act violated one of the few commandments that God had given mankind, be fruitful and multiply.

Onan was practicing birth control. He was unwilling to allow a child to be conceived by him as the child would be considered belonging to Er. Onan did not care what God’s direction was, he simply did what he wanted when he wanted and it ended up costing him his life.

The story of Onan is the opposite of the story of Boaz in Ruth. Boaz was a man of character who was willing to raise up a child for Ruth’s first husband. Boaz had seen the character of Ruth and while technically the child did not belong to him, the whole community recognized the special work that God had done with Boaz and Ruth.

God does not approve when we selfishly pursue the desires of our own heart. Just as there were consequences for Onan being selfish, so also, if we chose to act selfishly, God will not allow us to prosper. We must learn to love our neighbor as ourselves and to put the needs of others first.

It is easy to get caught up with our own desires and our own needs. God has given us the strength to say no when we are tempted to pursue our own selfish desires. By exercising temperance in our life, we enable ourselves not to pursue what appears to be best in our own eyes but instead to pursue the perfect will of God and put others first.

The pleasures of sin last for a few minutes but the treasures of heaven last for eternity. Where is your focus, is it upon yourself and what you want or is it upon God and what HE desires of you? Onan was looking out for only one person, himself and it cost him his life. While you may not find yourself in a situation exactly like Onan, you will constantly find yourself in a position where you must decide between your own selfish desires and put others first.

Onan’s act of selfishness actually cost him his life. Had he been willing to put others first, God would not have killed him and he would have lived many more years. Onan was being selfish because he desired to live for himself and God punished him. If you fight to put yourself first, you may find that the thing you fight for ends up destroying you.

Genesis 37:3 Now Israel loved Joseph more than all his children, because he was the son of his old age: and he made him a coat of many colors.

Jacob had twelve sons but he showed special attention to Joseph. Jacob had loved Rachel and Joseph was his first born son of the wife that he loved. However, because of Jacob’s special favoritism towards Joseph, we see that Joseph’s brothers despised him.

In his mind, Jacob had sufficient reason to give special attention to Joseph. However, the sons of Jacob were not fully able to understand the significance of Joseph to Jacob, especially now that Rachel was dead. The sons of Jacob knew that they were his sons and because they saw daddy playing favorites with Joseph, they came to hate someone whom they should have loved.

The gift of the coat of many colors was just one example of how Jacob demonstrated to all that Joseph was the son that he loved the most. While it is good to give gifts to one’s children, one should not do it in such a way that causes the other children not to feel loved. Every child has its own language of love, a way in which their parent must communicate with them in order to demonstrate true love. When a child feels love, they do not have to go out into the world to find their love from other sources.

Joseph was the son that felt his father’s love and when he was tempted, he had the strength to flee the temptation that he faced. Jacob’s other children did not feel their father’s love and there are many tragic stories that are demonstrated in the lives of Jacob’s children. We see that the daughter of Jacob was raped when she went into town to see the daughters of the land. We see that Reuben slept with his father’s concubine. We see that Judah slept with his daughter-in-law. Each of these stories is a demonstration of what one of the consequences might be when a child does not feel their father’s love.

When David’s daughter Tamar was raped, Absalom waited for his father to discipline Amnon. However, when David did not discipline his son who had committed a great evil, Absalom no longer respected his father and he took matters into his own hands to not only punish Amnon but to also punish David.

It is a great temptation to show favoritism to a particular child or to a particular person. However, the command to love your neighbor as yourself was given by Christ and includes all people. Every day we are going to encounter people who we will not want to love. They will do something that hurts us and we will chose to not love them the way that God desires us to love them.

The temptation to not love those who are different or who hard to get along with will be great. You must exercise great self-control to not allow yourself to be focused upon what people have done to you rather than how God desires that you respond to them. By adding temperance to your life, you can make sure that you show love to everyone God brings into your life.

It was not wrong to give Joseph a coat of many colors, what was wrong was not to show love to his other children. Love out of balance can do much harm. When Jacob failed to properly love his other children, he started a chain reaction that ended up in him losing his favorite son. However, while Jacob may have made a mistake, God was able to use that mistake to fulfill his perfect will.

Genesis 34:2 And when Shechem the son of Hamor the Hivite, prince of the country, saw her, he took her, and lay with her and defiled her.

Dinah, the daughter of Jacob was raped by Shechem. Shechem was a ruler and he saw Dinah and he desired her so he simply took what he wanted. Shechem did not exercise any self-control, he simply took what he wanted, when he wanted it regardless of how it would affect those around him.

Shechem appears to be more honorable than David’s son Amnon. Amnon saw his half-sister Tamar and he thought he loved her. Amnon and his friend devised a plan by which Amnon was alone with Tamar and this made it easy for him to rape his half sister. However, once Amnon had fulfilled the lusts of the flesh, he discarded Tamar from his presence as a bone from a piece of chicken that he had just eaten.

After Shechem had fulfilled the lusts of his flesh, Shechem still loved Dinah and he proceeded to ask Jacob to allow him to marry Dinah. Shechem was basically following the faulty premise that it is better to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission. How different this story could have turned out had Shechem been willing to control the passions of his flesh while he first went and asked Jacob to allow him to marry his daughter.

It is doubtful that Shechem would have so quickly raped Dinah had he known that the consequence of his action would be that he would lose his own life within a week. Shechem was in the line of succession to be a ruler. Shechem had the ears of the men of the city and he was very persuasive. However, because he allowed the lusts of his flesh to control his decisions, he set himself up so that he lost his kingdom and he lost his life.

Satan is always going to be quick to devise plans whereby you yield to the desires of your flesh. We do not have to yield to the lusts of our flesh but can overcome these temptations by putting the things of God first in our lives. When we add temperance to our lives, we start saying no to the temptations of this world so that we are free to more freely serve God.

Shechem is not the only man in the world who found his demise because he yielded to the sin of sexual immorality. Scripture shows us that the strongest man in the world, Samson, was led to his death by strange women. Scripture shows us that the wisest man in the world, Solomon, was led astray by strange women. Scripture shows us that a man after God’s own heart, David, sinned when he yielded to the temptation of pursuing the lusts of his flesh.

The fire of lust can appear to be rather small, however, if it is fanned, it will quickly destroy more than was ever contemplated. David did not control his sexual appetite and it was not very long after that we see great turmoil in his kingdom because Amnon rapes Tamar and then Absalom kills Amnon. Had David simply demonstrated self-control, he might have spared the turmoil in his own family that appears to be God’s judgment for his sin.

Shechem saw and he took what he wanted. Dinah did not have much choice in this matter; she was simply used for the pleasures of Shechem. Every day, millions of men try to enjoy the pleasures of sin by looking at pornography. They allow their eyes to feast upon that which seems desirable to them without contemplating the damage that is being done to others. Do not be deceived, God is not mocked, whatsoever a man sows, that will he also reap.

Proverbs 13:24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him quickly.

Why does God allow terrible things to happen to me? One of the reasons you may face certain trials and difficulties may just have to do with your sin. No one likes to admit it, but it is because God loves you that HE punishes you. You should be glad that God is willing to punish you now for your willful violations of HIS perfect law rather than wait until the great throne of judgment where it might just be too late.

David violated the perfect will of God when he committed adultery with Bath-sheba and later killed Uriah. David tried to sin in secret but God allowed the punishment of David to be done in the open so that all who saw understand that God does not allow those whom HE loves escape the consequences of violating the HIS perfect law.

The punishment that David faced as a result of his committing adultery and murder was that the son of adultery died. Next Amnon raped Tamar. Absalom ended up killing Amnon. Absalom tried to take away the throne of his father and he committed adultery with 10 of David’s concubines. David had ordered that the life of Absalom be spared, but Joab had Absalom killed anyways. Even after the death of David, Solomon ended up killing Adonijah after he had made an attempt on the throne.

One mistake of doing what seemed right at that moment resulted in much chastisement by God. David loved the Lord; in fact we are told that he had a heart after the heart of God. Yet David chose to do what was right in his own eyes and he suffered the consequences. It was because God loved David that we see God coming down so hard upon David.

Look at Judah, the son of Jacob. Judah committed adultery by sleeping with his daughter-in-law yet there is no indication in scripture that God punished Judah to the same level that he punished David. David had a close relationship with God and because of this close relationship God chose to be more severe with David.

Just because someone seems to be going through a very difficult time, it does not mean that they are being corrected by God. Remember, Joseph chose not to commit adultery with the wife of Potiphar yet he still suffered false accusations and several years in prison. God does allow certain trials into our lives to prepare us for the future.

Have you faced a particularly difficult time in your life where you were wondering why God was allowing you to suffer? It may just be that you need to confess your sins and recognize God for who HE is. Do not curse God for the trials that you face, instead, learn to thank HIM for loving you enough to correct you for your failure to obey HIM.

It is a fool who sees the correction of God and says that God hates him. A wise individual has spent the time adding knowledge of the ways of God and as a result, he understands that the correction of God demonstrates the love of God. The more time you spend adding knowledge of the ways of God, the better understanding you will have of the love of God and this will better enable you to share the truth with those whom God has brought into your life.

Proverbs 11:22 As a jewel of gold in a swine’s snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion.

Pigs naturally use their nose to dig up dirt. To a pig, dirt provides them valuable vitamins and minerals they need in order to stay healthy. Furthermore, by digging up dirt, they find worms, grubs and small insects. A pig does not have any sweat glands to cool itself, as such, they need to roll in mud or water in order to keep cool. Some people in an attempt to control a pig have put a ring in the snout of a pig. They think a pig would make a great pet but they do not want their yard to look like a pigpen.

Why would you put a ring of gold upon the nose of a pig? Does it make any sense to put such a valuable possession on a pig? Just because you put a ring on the nose of a pig, it does not mean that the pig is not going to work on getting it off. As the pig tries to rid itself of the ring that is hindering him from doing what comes natural to him, it will tarnish and try to destroy that which is so valuable to you. The pig does not care whether the ring is made of gold, iron, or wood, all the pig knows is that it is something that needs to be removed so it can get back to normal life.

In this passage we see the comparison of putting a ring of gold on a pig to a beautiful woman who is without discretion. Solomon is warning men that there is more to a relationship then just the outward beauty. If all you are doing is looking at the natural beauty of a woman and not looking at her inward character, then you will find an extremely shallow relationship.

Peter advised women not to put their attention upon their outward appearances but let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price (1 Peter 3:4). God is more concerned about the heart of a woman then HE is about their outward appearances. In Proverbs 31, we are told what men should look for in a wife. Proverbs 31 does not list a bunch of outward appearances that one should look for in finding a wife; instead, it describes character that if manifested will result in a solid relationship.

Amnon thought he loved his half-sister Tamar. However, once Amnon had raped Tamar, he discovered that his lust could not be satisfied and he now despised that which he had desired so much. So likewise, if your attention is set upon beauty, it will never be satisfied, if you attention is upon inward character, you can be satisfied.

Where is your attention? Are you caught up in the outward beauty of the rich and famous? Are you more concerned about how a person sounds then you are about the substance of their life? If you only look at the surface of a man, you will be greatly disappointed.

You have an obligation to God to add knowledge of the ways of God to your life. As you study the scriptures, you will learn that God does not look at outward appearances but God looks at the heart. It is the heart that tells you what kind of individual you are dealing with. The more knowledge you have of the ways of God, the more God will be able to direct you towards those who also have a proper relationship with God.

Proverbs 11:3 The integrity of the upright shall guide them: but the perverseness of transgressors shall destroy them.

Every day you have a choice in what you are going to do. You can choose to do the will of God, or you can choose to do that which is right in your own eyes. Those who understand the ways of God and chose to implement them into their life have boundaries in their life that they will not cross and thus making certain decisions are easy. The wicked however do not have any boundaries and as such, they simply do what they want when they want and are soon destroyed.

Joseph was a man of integrity. One day he was faced with a decision. The wife of his master Potiphar asked him to sleep with her. Because of the integrity of the heart of Joseph, he refused her request. The wife of Potiphar did not go away but she continually asked him to sleep with her. One day Joseph was alone in the house and when she grabbed a hold of his garment, he left his garment and fled the house. Because of the decision that Joseph had made in his heart that he was not going to sin against God, that decision guided Joseph in the way he should go.

Judah, an older brother of Joseph one day was walking through a town and he saw a harlot. Judah saw the harlot and he approached her and asked her to sleep with him. Judah later found out that he had slept with his daughter-in-law Tamar. Tamar knew the perverseness of the heart of Judah and she was able to set a trap for Judah so that he caused her to become pregnant, something that the sons of Judah would not do. Judah had no moral standards and Tamar knew it and thus she was able to trap him.

In Proverbs 11:5, this principle is repeated when we are told that The righteousness of the perfect shall direct his way: but the wicked shall fall by his own wickedness. The principle is repeated a third time when we are told that Righteousness keepeth him that is upright in the way: but wickedness overthroweth the sinner.

The nation of Israel often did that which was right in their own eyes. This means that they did not choose to follow the ways of God but instead chose to do that which made them feel good. Because they had no standards, God had to send a foreign country to come and subdue them. If the nation of Israel had chosen to do the right thing, then God never would have needed to send another king to subdue them and cause them to once again turn their eyes upon the perfect standards of God.

When you take the time to add knowledge of the ways of God to your life, you have an understanding of the boundaries that God has placed in your life. These boundaries will give you guidance of what you are to do. However, if you chose to not follow the ways of God, whether you understand them or not, then your life will have no boundaries and you will sooner or later, come to a point that you destroy your own life.

Life is like a sailboat, if you do not look at the map and just choose to sail where you want to sail, you can easily run aground in some shallow water. However, if you choose to follow the navigation channels, you have some boundaries that protect you from destroying the boat. The Bible is your road map to life; use it to guide your decisions.

Proverbs 10:24 The fear of the wicked, it shall come upon him: but the desire of the righteous shall be granted.

You have heard to delight yourself in the Lord and he shall give you the desires of your heart. As a Christian, what are the things that you are supposed to desire so that God will give them to you? Solomon writes, The desire of the righteous is only good: (Proverbs 11:23).

The Hebrew word that is translated desire in this passage means a longing, a delight, greed, lust, pleasant. The word thus has both a positive and negative meaning. It is important to first understand what things we are to desire after so that we can receive the desires of our heart. Just because we desire something and God gives it to us, it does not mean that it was the perfect will of God.

This Hebrew word first shows up in the Bible during the story of Adam and Eve sinning in the garden. Genesis 3:6 says And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat. (Genesis 3:6). The word pleasant in this passage is the same word that Solomon uses for desire. Eve saw the fruit and she lusted after it and she took it and consumed it.

Another negative example occurs in Numbers 11 where the nation of Israel desires flesh to eat. The people are remembering the fish that they had to fish to eat in Egypt. They desired meat so bad that they started lusting after it and complaining to Moses. God ended up giving them the desires of their heart, but HE gave them so much quail that within a month they utterly despised what they were asking for.

It will never satisfy for you to receive the desires of your heart if the desires of your heart are not right before God. Eve was not satisfied when she ate from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. The nation of Israel was not satisfied when they obtained quail. Amnon was not satisfied after he raped his half-sister Tamar, and instead, he had great hatred for his sister after he had consumed that which he desired.

David tells us that Lord, thou hast heard the desire of the humble: thou wilt prepare their heart, thou wilt cause thine ear to hear: To judge the fatherless and the oppressed, that the man of the earth may no more oppress. (Psalms 10:17-18). David also wrote, Lord, all my desire is before thee; and my groaning is not hid from thee. (Psalms 38:9). The desire of the heart of David was to see justice and to be with God.

What is the desire of your heart? Do you desire something so that you can consume it upon your own lusts? If you desire something that is not proper, be careful because you just might get it and the consequences will be worse then having the desire fulfilled.

It requires knowledge of the ways of God to understand what desires are proper and which ones you need to weed out from your life. The closer your relationship with God is, the easier it will be for you to understand the way God desires you to live and the more your desires will conform with the desires of God. When you desire what God desires, you will enjoy the blessings of God of receiving an answer to your prayers in HIS timing.

2 Samuel 13:15 Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone.

Amnon, the son of King David had just raped his half-sister Tamar. Amnon had thought he loved his half-sister so he and a friend created a plan by which Amnon was able to rape his half-sister. However, once Amnon had raped Tamar, he discovered that he actually had no love for her.

Amnon thought he was in love and thus he sexually possessed that which he desired. In 1 Corinthians 13:5, we learn that love is not easily provoked. The word provoked can also mean excited or roused. Amnon’s heart was full of lust and while he thought it was love, if he had actually examined his desires, he would have saw that he was merely excited and roused by Tamar.

Too often, people think that they have love for another, but in reality it is lust. If the love that you are seeking is easily excited, it is probably not love that will last a lifetime and can quickly turn as we see it did with Amnon. Amnon’s love for Tamar never lasted because it was easily provoked. Amnon chose to take what he thought he deserved and he found that it did not satisfy.

1 Corinthians 13:5 Doth not behave itself unseemly

Love behaves itself. Love does not do something that is indecent. In this passage, the Hebrew word that is interpreted behave itself unseemly, is used one other time in scripture. In 1 Corinthians 7:36, Paul writes, But if any man think that he behaveth himself uncomely toward his virgin, if she pass the flower of her age, and need so require, let him do what he will, he sinneth not: let them marry.

People do a lot of things in the name of love. Amnon raped his half-sister Tamar because he claimed to love her. However, after he had had his way with her, the hatred he had for her was greater than the love he thought he had for her. Job on the other hand made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid? (Job 31:1). Job understood the importance in not acting in a way that was improper. Job had a wife and he was faithful to that wife and thus he not only was careful about what he looked at, he was careful about what he thought about.

We know that Joseph was a just man and that when he heard Mary was pregnant, he wished to put her away secretly. Joseph loved Mary enough that while he was not going to tarnish his own reputation, he was going to release himself from Mary in a way that limited the amount of scorn that she received. We need to learn from the example of Job and Joseph. We need to ensure that our contact with others is proper so that no one can ever question our behavior and say that we have acted improperly towards someone of the opposite gender.

Proverbs 3:12 For whom the LORD loveth he correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he delighteth.

When you were a child, your parents probably disciplined you when you did something that was wrong. Your parent may have even said something like this hurts me more than it hurts you or I am doing this because I love you. At the time, these statements made absolutely no sense to you. However, as you have matured, you see the truth in the statements of your parents.

A parent who loves their child does not like correcting them. However, it is because of that love they have for their children that they know they must discipline their child when they do not follow the rules. A good parent understands that they are accountable to God for how they raised the children that God gave to them. A good parent understands that they have the responsibility to train up a child in the way they should go so that when they are old they will not depart from it. A good parent understands that they are responsible to teach their children the good things that God has done in their life and to teach the child the commands of God.

Parents understand that if their child breaks a rule, the child must be punished promptly or else the child might continue to break the rule. Some children like to test the boundaries more than others, but at some time, every child will cross the line and deliberately disobey. A parent who loves their child understands that if they do not discipline their child, that the child will be setting the rules in the house.

When you take the time to add knowledge of the ways of God, you understand that God is our Father. In the same way an earthly father must disciple his son, so your Heavenly Father must disciple you when you disobey HIM. Discipline is never easy to receive, but you must recognize it for what it is, it is the love of God who does not allow you to disobey HIS perfect law.

When David committed adultery with Bath-sheba, God punished him by bringing up evil out of his own house. The son conceived out of adultery died. Later on, David had a daughter, Tamar, that was raped by her own brother Amnon. Because David did not discipline Amnon, Absalom took matters into his own hands and killed Amnon. Furthermore, Absalom later made an attempt for the throne of David, but he ended up losing his life. Even after the death of David, after David had named Solomon as king in his stead, Adonijah another son of David made an attempt at the throne of Solomon and Solomon had Adonijah killed.

David may have repented for his sin with Bath-sheba, but the discipline of God was still strong. God disciplined David so that we all know that there is a consequence when we fail to obey HIM. Just because we ask for forgiveness, it does not mean that God will not continue to allow us to suffer the consequences for our actions. It is because HE loves us that HE must correct us. This may sound harsh to you until you think about your own childhood and the punishments you received or others around you. Your parents may have caught you doing something wrong when you were a teenager, and as a result, you may have been grounded from certain activities or being around certain friends for as long as a year.

Knowledge of the ways of God allows you to see that it is because of the love of God for you that HE must correct you when you go astray. The greater the sin, the greater the consequences. God cannot allow the world to think that sin does not have any consequences.