GIVE ME THE DAMSEL TO WIFE – Genesis 34:12
Genesis 34:12 Ask me never so much dowry and gift, and I will give according as ye shall say unto me: but give me the damsel to wife.
Shechem had just raped Dinah. Shechem saw what he wanted and he took it. However, once he had exploited Dinah for his own fleshly lusts, he discovered that he was not content and that he desired to have Dinah for his wife. Shechem spoke with his father and with Dinah’s father Jacob and said he was willing to pay any sum in order to obtain Dinah as his wife.
Even though Shechem had defiled Dinah, Shechem understood the value of Dinah. Shechem was not concerned about the price that Jacob would charge him, all he was concerned about was obtaining that which he perceived had great value.
How much more beautiful this story would have been had Shechem only been able to exercise self-control of his lusts. Shechem saw the value in Dinah and he was willing to pay any price that Jacob named so as to obtain the valuable treasure that he discovered.
Husbands need to learn to value their wives as Shechem valued Dinah. Your wife is a valuable treasure and you should be willing to pay any price in order to obtain and keep that valuable gift that God has given unto you. Jesus tells us that where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Shechem was willing to give up great treasure so that his heart could be with Dinah.
Men, when was the last time that you gave up your treasure in order to obtain something for your wife. When was the last time you gave up your time so as to do some projects that your wife desired to be done? Yes you could have spent that money on something you enjoyed, but instead, by spending it upon your wife, you demonstrated to your wife your love for her. Rather than spending the weekend watching your favorite team play a game, by giving your time to her, you demonstrated to her just how valuable she was to you.
I Peter 3:7 charges husbands to dwell with their wives according to knowledge, and give honor unto their wives as unto a weaker vessel. Women are similar to valuable china whereas men can be more like Tupperware. If a husband treats his wife as he treats his best friend, he will do great damage to his relationship with his wife. Men are warned in 1 Peter 3:7 that if they do not properly treat their wives the way that God intended, then their prayers will be hindered.
Shechem did not have the greatest start with his relationship with Dinah. However, we see that he was willing to do whatever it took to start repairing the damage that he had caused. He was not going to allow his money to hinder him from doing the right thing.
While you are on this earth, you must be careful that you do not allow the lusts of your flesh to destroy your relationship with your wife. Next to God, your relationship with your wife should be the most important thing to you. You should be willing to pay any price in order to obtain and maintain that relationship. You must be willing to demonstrate self-control so that you can help your wife bloom where she is planted.
The lusts of your flesh will not only trample your relationship with God but also that of your wife. Jesus taught that you can only serve God or money, you cannot serve both. So likewise, you cannot serve both the needs of your wife and yourself, you must choose one. Adding temperance to your life will allow you to prioritize others above your pocketbook.